We all make mistakes. But both parents
and children become paralyzed with fear that they will make the same mistake
twice. They pile themselves with guilt over their inability to get the simplest
of things right.
This can happen with parenting issues
and just everyday living for kids. We are all negotiating new skills and
projects, new challenges and crisis. The fear of getting it wrong makes it
worse.
A local college sent a group of young
people and their professor to Rwanda to assist area pastors in reaching out to
the poor and needy in their community. Faced with language and cultural
barriers they experienced real trepidation. They decided right away to
implement a version of Nike’s ‘Just Do It’.
Since they were going to make mistakes
anyway, they decided to plan on at least five mistakes a day. That took the
stress off the group and they were able to jump into challenging situations
with the knowledge that they had a ‘quota’ of mistakes to fill!
This concept of allowing for five mistakes
has been freeing for me. And I’m working to apply it to my parenting.
Encouraging my adult children to make room for mistakes curbs my own
expectations for them as well as their expectations for themselves. We feel a
greater freedom to jump in and try things, rather than slowly trying to get
everything ‘just right’.
Will you try to allow
for making mistakes in your parenting? Join in with a StandUp Parenting parent
group, face-to-face or online, to get the support you need to make these
freeing changes in your life!